‘Fierce Grace’
Ram Dass
Until
spring arrives and we get busy in the gardens once again, you’re going to hear
from me about films I’ve seen. Other than hugs and kisses, reading, meditating, attending
classes, nurturing houseplants, creating vegan meals, sprouting wheatgrass, doing
yoga, and cuddling with the floofers, great documentaries and other films are
what keep me sane indoors until the blesséd growing season returns.
Last
night, we saw the documentary ‘Fierce Grace’. A definite two thumbs up for this
one. ‘Fierce Grace’ is the life story of Ram Dass, one of the most world’s
prominent spiritual leaders of the late 20th century-to present.
The
film gives a light treatment to his early life. He was born Richard Alpert to
an accomplished Jewish family in Boston, attended prominent universities
(including Wesleyan, my alma mater), worked as a professor at UC Berkley and
eventually Harvard, fathered a child, met Tim Leary, tried LSD, gave psilocybin
to a student and was dismissed from Harvard, traveled to India, met Neem Karoli
Baba, took refuge, became his student, embraced spirituality, changed his name,
wrote books (including the seminal 1971 book, ‘Be Here Now’, a copy of which I
own), became a guru, came out as bisexual, founded the Hanuman Foundation,
joined the faculty at the Metta Institute, worked as a therapist, moved to
Maui, and gave away his money (up to $800,000 a year).
But
this film focuses largely on the years since Dass had a catastrophic cerebral stroke
in 1997, at the age of 65. The stroke left him paralyzed on his right side and
suffering permanently from expressive aphasia – an inability to form complete
sentences or recall certain words. He’s been wheelchair-bound and in physical
and speech therapy in the 20 years since.
The
stroke thrust Dass into a very dark depression. He said afterward that he had lost
all connection to God: spirituality didn’t interest him at all. He felt no love
for himself or others. He was angry that the stroke had happened to him. He
indulged in a lot of self-pity. His wonderful mind was closing down.
But
slowly, and with determination, he came back from that cold, cold place. He
emerged with an enlightened mind and a desire to instruct others who have
suffered devastating losses. He called the experience ‘fierce grace’. He then wrote
revolutionary books like ‘Still Here: Embracing Aging, Changing, and Dying’,
‘Paths to God: Living the Bhagavad Gita’, ‘Be Love Now’, and ‘Polishing the
Mirror: How to Live from Your Spiritual Heart’. And he agreed to be filmed for
this documentary.
What I
love-love-love about Dass’s life story is not his many accomplishments, but his
common humanness. As advanced a being as he is, he has lived a life as fraught
with mistakes and obstacles as anyone else’s. He never did nor does he now
elevate himself to the level of mystic or holy man, even though he is
considered both by millions.
My
personal history is also replete with what our culture calls ‘success’ – stable
family, reasonable wealth, academic accomplishment, world travel, successful
careers, authoring, publishing, teaching, etc. – but it also includes chapters
that I’d like to strike from the record. Dass’s life reinforces my belief that aspiring
to live with compassion and seeking the face of God are not impeded by a mixed
personal history. Despite who I am or who I’ve been, I may still strive to wake
up and walk with the seekers, all of whom are like you and me.
We are
all human, and we all fall. I’ve understood this for a long time. Understanding
it has made it possible for me to encounter people who harm or deceive me, and
yet still love them and not respond in anger or retaliation.
Rage and revenge
accomplishes nothing. By living in anger, you only make a hell for yourself. Responding
to each person and event with pure love and compassion has made it possible to
rise from the ashes of whatever hardships have come my way. It’s made others’
lives holier. It’s made my life holier.
And
even when the darkness comes – and it does, as it did with Dass – there’s a craving
to climb out of that cold place and walk in the light again. So, we work our
way back to higher consciousness, and once we have, we share what we’ve learned
with others. And in the process, continue to learn ourselves.
I’m
very fortunate to have access to films like this one. They’re out there, but
not everyone knows about them. I keep stumbling across these gifts and
gathering up their messages. Each time the ending credits roll, I ask myself
why I’m such a lucky girl. Who keeps throwing these amazing stories in my path?
Films like this one teach me how to ask questions, love purely, reach for
truth, spread peace, extend compassion, and live honestly.
Peace
and love to you.
