Patience as a Mantra
We’re entering the 23rd month of winter here in
Connecticut. At least it feels that way. Today is April 19, and there’s ice
falling from the sky. It’s near freezing, I haven’t seen the sun in weeks, and
waking up each morning and facing this is testing my patience to the maximum.
But I'm in a nasty little rut of complaining
about it. I think about it too much. I listen to recordings of the night sounds
of Hawaii and am irritated that I’m not there. I see a nice pair of new summer
sandals, then whine that I shouldn’t I buy them because summer is never
coming. I hold packets of garden seeds and bore holes in them with my eyes,
because it’s too cold to plant. I gritch to whomever is willing to listen. Most
of all, I feel sorry for my selfish self. It’s all bad Sakti; and a dearth of patience.
But listen. Do I have a loyal and loving husband
whose company I look forward every day? I’m blessed. Do I have a home to go to
each night? I’m blessed. Do I have my choice of an abundance of awesome vegan
foods? I’m blessed. Do I have family whom I love and who loves me and has my
back when I need them? I’m blessed. Do I even have extra money after the bills
are paid with which to do silly shopping for things I don’t necessarily need
but want? I’m blessed. Can I still be of service to others every single day? I’m
blessed.
I have food and flower gardens about to come to life, a dog
that’s a perfect and loving floof, bookcases of great books and a comfy chair where
I can sit and read them, a cupboard full of teas, a boat that takes my husband
and I to the blesséd ocean all summer, a good job working with good people, apparent good health, a torn meniscus that’s healing, amazing friends,
beautiful memories, hope for the future, clear skin, straight teeth, and pretty
good hair.
I have the luxury of exploring non-essential interests like
Ayurveda and pottery-making. I have time to pen this blog. And at any time, I
have the freedom to change the game entirely and become a completely different
person with a completely different life.
I’m going to bull my way through the rest of this
apocalyptic season and stop complaining. Yes, this weather is the unqualified
pits, no question about it. And because of it, life lately has been feeling
like a bit of a grind.
But the obstacle is always the path. Today's mantra is 'Patience'. We all know that soon, the worm will turn. Patience will pay off. Gardens will grow. The sun will find us again.
Barbie xo
